LINCOLN — The tale of the tail end may have reached an end. At least that's what folks in Valentine, Neb., hope after someone slathered his bare backside — and front side — with Vaseline, then left prints on windows of businesses, schools and churches.Rewards offered through Crime Stoppers failed to halt the pants-dropping perpetrator's spree, which began in May.The local Midland News newspaper called the vandal or vandals "lewd, lubricated, lurching lunatics." A radio station dubbed them "the buttcheek bandits."
Update:
The pair are now being blamed for not only smearing the town of Lincoln, but the entire state of Nebraska.
In light of this breaking news:
BP poses the following hypothetical: which is worse?
Being the buttcheek bandit or Steve P?
Answer: Steve P.
Why? Because when he's eventually caught, the bandit will plead to a misdeameanor and be forgotten. As for Steve P- he can't show his face at a restaurant, a mall, a gas station, (and most of all) a Nebraska game ever again without facing public ridicule.
His 'dream job' is now a nightmare.
He's the OJ of the plain states and his Al Cowlings, Marc Boehm, will forever be his assistant butt bandit.
4 comments:
Hangman you are going to feel like a dumbass when Pederson is named PItt AD once again. He'll be even better as he has something to prove. The guy basically saved pitt football and basketball. Guys like you would keep the entire university in the dark ages. if you can't see the forrest through the trees there's no helping you. thanks for tailgating though hypocrite.
Pederson ruined one of America's most historic programs in Nebraska. Yeah, let's bring him back to Pitt! Great idea moron. He alienated thousands at Nebraska and he did it at Pitt too. Let's bring him back! He called Sonny Vaccaro and he gave him Ben Howland. He tore down Pitt Stadium and now Pitt plays at the Steelers stadium--great idea. He got a basketball arena, yeah that was real tough to do once there was a vacant lot moron. Let's bring back Steve! Our program was soooooo good when he left. Just remember, he hired Walter. And he gave the job to Matt Cavanaugh before him, but he turned him down. Oh yea, let's have him bring Bill Callahan to Pitt. He is doing a great job at Nebraska. Or better yet, let's get Al Saunders who he tried to hire and he turned him down too at Nebraska. Bottom line is, the man has worn out his welcome nationally. Only Pitt would be dumb enough to hire him. Yet, once again, Mark Nordenberg is running the program into the ground, so hey--Bring Back Steve. We can all watch the Pitt program strive for mediocrity. You f'ing moron.
the problem he had in nebraska was he couldnt overcome the entrenched alumni to get anything changed. he didnt give a rats ass about the people trying stop him at pitt. hence he got things done here. say what you want but at least walt got us to some bowl games. wannstedt may turn out to be okay but he'll always be just that. pederson knew that at pitt you had to get the hoops team up to help legitamize a faltering football team. the pete did that. by the way the name calling doesnt make your argument right moron.
I called you a moron cause you called Hangman a dumbass. Quit posting anonymously Steve.
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